


Never again mead.

by Cindy_Svensson



Series: You annoy me (don't stop). [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: F/M, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-13
Updated: 2013-02-13
Packaged: 2017-11-29 03:25:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/682181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cindy_Svensson/pseuds/Cindy_Svensson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy really needs to pee.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never again mead.

It was impossible to move. Okay, impossible was an exaggeration on her part, but Darcy really couldn’t move much due to the man half laying on top of her.

She was staring at the ceiling of her guest room in Stark Tower, feeling strands of hair – hers or his she didn’t know – tickling her mouth, a black head of hair visible if she lifted her head a bit. But Darcy didn’t dare to do that again, since her head felt like it was both filled with cotton and angry dwarves with hammers, much like the ones at the party last night (even though they had been happy dwarves, invited by Thor to celebrate his and Jane’s engagement).

“Never again mead,” her hoarse voice declared, robbed of its usual clarity and melody.

“Agreed,” joined a second voice, muffled against her left breast.

The voice confirmed Darcy suspicions of whom it was that lay on top of her. She had hoped it was Hogun or Sif, both dark headed. She supposed she should have guessed it was a male considering the soreness between her legs.

Darcy couldn’t tell if the drool she felt on her chest made Loki cute or gross. Certainly less intimidating, which is why she decided to anger the dwarves in her head even more and not so lightly slap Loki’s ass. She kind of missed and hit his back, but she felt it was worth it, even as both the dwarves and the God on her chest made unhappy movements. But now Darcy discovered the dwarves were also living more south, beating with little hammers on her bladder.

Loki chuckled as his lover groaned.

“Why did Thor - ouch, my eyeballs hurt – bring it? I only drank half a-, a-… tankard? Mead holder thing-y, and I can’t remember anything. Well, just that I kissed…”

 _‘…you’_ , her muddled brain finished. _‘You kissed Loki and more. Stupid stupid woman.’_

Some of the cotton disappeared and Darcy realized two things. One, she slept with Loki, a recovering mass murderer. Two, if anyone found out, she would no longer be ignored by The Avengers. They would either judge or mock her. And her boss would stop respecting her, a respect that had been hard to earn.

The second thing kind of meant she needed to get Loki out of her room immediately, but thing number one also meant she had to be delicate about throwing him out, since she didn’t quite trust that the anti-doing-evil-stuff spell the All-Father had put on Loki was fool proof.

What to do, what to do?

As Darcy laid thinking, she hadn’t noticed how the very heavy weight on top of her had started to move as Loki woke up more and more. She actually yelped when she felt a somewhat cool tongue whisper across her nipple, before a soft and wet mouth closed around her nub.

Unfortunately - or fortunately, depending on your point of view – the desire shooting through Darcy’s nerve endings from her breast to her clit also made her bladder very sensitive and she needed to pee now.

But thing number one was still a factor.

_‘Oh, to hell with it.’_

“I need to pee, now.”

She had never seen Loki move as fast as he did then, jumping up from the bed onto the floor. Darcy would have laughed at the combination of stiff little – well, big - Loki staring at her at her eye level and the face looking down at her in uncomfortable horror quickly contorting into a expression of pain, as Loki grabbed his head with both hands.

Crawling up from the bed and making it to the bathroom just in time – nearly falling down several times, her hips and legs unwilling to cooperate – Darcy was relieved to hear Loki get dressed and flee her bedroom. But that left her with a new dilemma.

Who was going to help her up from the toilet? Her previously hard to control legs would now hardly move.

Darcy swore to herself to never get so drunk she would ever sleep with a male of any species – that came out wrong – that big again, or that strong. While the assistant was sure her body had never quite hummed with content as much as it did now, she really didn’t need to know that “being fucked until you can’t walk” wasn’t just an expression.

**The end?**

**Author's Note:**

> I’m thinking of turning this into a series, but I need prompts for that. Also, it’s unbeta’d, so don’t be afraid to leave critique about the little stuff.


End file.
